day 2 – Musings (Apr 14, 2008)

November 24, 2008 at 8:35 pm Leave a comment


Today was harder than yesterday, even after 8 of hours sleep. A fabulous reward awaited me in Dallas: my sweet, 2-year-old niece and her wonderful mom, who is so patient with me as I try to absorb some parenting skills.

Bad habits die hard:
(*note: read if you like deep and ponder-some thoughts; skip below if you prefer light and fluffy commentary)

I realized yesterday that this trip was going to help me with efficiency by keeping me away from the office. There I’m likely to find something to keep me busy and stressed without getting anything done… here, with limited access to email, I’m more likely to get things done quickly and walk away keeping me refreshed. However, just hours after making that proclamation, I returned to work-a-holic, responsibility freak mode and worked for double the amount of time I had allotted. Then I repeated the pattern of running late, feeling bad for the trouble I was causing others and feeling bad for the unhappiness I was bring upon myself. I had earlier diagnosed this as from a source of unworthiness… ie. I need to do more in order to be worthy, so therefor I always try to do too much and end up confirming the belief that I’m not good enough as I always let others and myself down. This is still possibly the core of it, so lets trace it back.
“What was I trying to do?”: Get launched.
“Why?” : Because I had created post cards for the trip and passed them out to people advertising the site and i was embarrassed that it wasn’t up yet.
“Why were you embarrassed?” Because it made me look unprofessional and missed the point of creating the cards in the first place.
“Why do you want to look professional?” Because then people will like me, think i’m successful, want to hire me, etc.
“Why do you want to be liked, successful, and hired?” Because its enjoyable?
“Why is enjoying life dependent on being liked, successful and hired?” “or is it?” hmmm… that’s a good one. must ruminate, will return at a later date.

I also remembered a lot of my business ideas while listening to “The Four-Day Work Week” and felt the old ticker pumping again. I immediately had to calm myself down as the pressure feelings came over me. “gotta do it now! gotta make it happen!” on and on. Release… I am completely cared for in this Universe and my path continues to blossom and unfold at the perfect pace.

It’s a tie… Arkadelphia and Texarkana… what’s the deal with Arkansas putting Arka in all the names of their cities and naming it after another place? What’s the deal with Arkansas’ name anyway… it looks like Ar – Kansas… why didn’t they pronounce it that way if they were going to copy their distant neighbor… I mean, since when did the letters “sas” get pronounced “saw?!!!” Silliness, total silliness. There has to be a story! – just fascinating! 🙂 – didn’t pick up on the “ana” part!

I didn’t realize how many lakes are around Dallas, or that it has a hill… so you can imagine my surprise when I didn’t even notice the slight grade I was climbing when I crested one on I-30 South to a beautiful view of downtown Dallas to the left and water as far as the eye could see with the sun low in the sky. I was too slow to capture it with my camera, the video in my album is after I had already descended a bit and downtown was no longer visible. It was a neat moment.

Chicken trucks… both days… sad. Yea! free range chickens! happy chickens taste better! 🙂

lots of cows…moo!

Zippy, the pet kitty

Dead ones: saw lots of Wolf road kill… surprising… and one semi-squished armadillo… which was actually kind of cool.


Entry filed under: BLISSfix Roadtrip 2008.

day 2 – Destination Dallas, TX (Apr 14, 2008) day 3 – Destination Albuquerque (Apr 15th, 2008)

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